SHELDON Hypothesis 255. The Eagle-Eyed Boy fails.
SHELDON I want to understand why he chooses to fail. Hypothesis 255: George Cooper Sr. is not intellectually incapable of responsibility. He is emotionally allergic to it. The allergy manifests as avoidance. Beer is the antihistamine.
Sheldon takes a bite. Chews. Swallows.
The kitchen is silent except for the hum of the refrigerator. Sheldon Cooper, age 9, sits alone at the table. Before him: a legal pad, three sharpened pencils, and a single cold meatloaf slice.
MEEMAW Welcome to Texas, honey.
MEEMAW That’s the saddest thing you’ve ever said, and you once explained why fireworks are just controlled explosions celebrating war victories.
MEEMAW You want to fix him?
SHELDON If I am truly eagle-eyed, I should have predicted the outcome. Instead, I watched my mother cry in the laundry room. Then I calculated the decibel level of her sobs. 73 decibels. The same as a vacuum cleaner.